Just as Abraham argued with God on how many faithful people were necessary to spare a city from destruction, how many people in your community need to be ready for you to take a step? Plan to start small, then invite and share what you are doing more broadly. If it is invitational it might prompt the conversation in a more fruitful direction.

There will always be reasons to wait, to say you’re not ready. But there are as many reasons to begin. If you are waiting for perfection or permission, you will be waiting a long time. There is a Christian beauty in moving forward with vulnerability in faith.

As storytellers, we have experienced how heavy it is to tell kids these stories and we have also been amazed that children receive the stories with much less weight. As adult storytellers we have already internalized and in some cases benefit from how systemic racism operates in our lives. There is a great deal at stake when this is exposed because we are indicted by this truth.

As adults we often project our own fears and concerns onto children in an effort to protect them. But, what a gift it would have been if an adult had taught us about the lie of racism when we were children. Instead many of us have been taught that talking about race is impolite and that racism is a thing of the past.

Louise Derman-Sparks has said, "Talking with children about hard issues helps them learn to cope with them. It's the silence that is scary and painful." Children receive this discussion as a sad reality of things that happened before their part of the story began. They leave after hearing the stories feeling empowered and respected, not ashamed. This is why we frame our work as a gift to children, because we have the chance to free them from internalizing these lies.

As Desmond Tutu is often quoted as saying: “There comes a point where we need to stop just pulling people out of the river. We need to go upstream and find out why they are falling in.”

We wish that were true, but many well respected studies of children as young as one year old have discovered that children not only notice racial differences but also place value judgements on them. This developmental phase of the brain continues through early childhood, and ends at around 8 years old. Children are immersed in a culture which tells them stories about who they are and who others are, a culture in which systemic racism is entrenched. They will learn to absorb these racial biases and repeat them unless we interrupt those lies. What’s more likely true is that the parents you're speaking to are unwilling or afraid to “see race” or recognize the systemic racial bias in our culture. Consider that even parents who recognize systemic bias can be paralyzed by their own discomfort around talking about it, and they might welcome guidance from their church leaders. In other cases, parents are unable to see race because the systems hide it “in plain sight”. Therefore, be gentle and invitational with parents; bring them into a process that allows them to grow and to begin to discover where race lives in society, too. We’ve done this with book study groups using Raising White Kids by Jennifer Harvey to prompt discussion. Also tell our stories to adults and wonder with them. " Check out this episode of the Early Risers podcast to hear from experts in the field about how ignoring difference is more than a missed opportunity; children will rely on messages from our culture to draw their own conclusions unless we tell them the truth as informed by our faith.

You might be right. The national discourse around issues of race has become so polarized that it can be dangerous to your career and even to you personally to embrace this work. Don’t be a hero, and worse, don’t be a white savior! Rather, start small, be careful, and find allies who are ready to support you. We find that many people, when they hear about our program, think they need to implement it for a whole congregation or school-wide, and get (rightly) nervous as to how risky that might be. Instead, start a wondering group, and lean on the faith elements that emphasize how this is a value based conversation grounded in Christian formation, not political indoctrination. Allow your community to lead the discussion instead of instigating this work for them.

Dismantling racism needs to take place within white communities to liberate us from debilitating burdens of perceived superiority and the shame and guilt carried from the actions of their ancestors. Racism distorts the dignity of all people including white people and people of color. The lie of racism creates human hierarchies that tell us that some people are better or worse than others. Because white people have benefited from the lie of racism it is our responsibility to engage in this work, especially in predominantly white communities.

Find a partner who shares your passion, desire, and faithful commitment to the journey of telling the truth. Any true commitment to this work is both internal and external. We sometimes get frustrated at our limitations in changing other people and systems but we all have the ability to change ourselves. It is from the internal work that we become the change we want to see in the world. You can start this work with God's help and a trustworthy partner knowing you are not alone. This is why we always encourage participants in our training to bring an auditor at no extra charge, so they can experience the growth and engage in the work with a partner at their side.